I have begun a new search in my life. It is not one for a soul mate or a search for riches, or even a search for meaning, it is one of connection. For the people that i know and know me I am not the most worm and fuzzy kind of person. I am way too over-bearing, sometimes demanding and definitely too self-righteous in my view. I am not a slave to fashion or all that driven on most days. What I am all the down to my core is inquisitive and I actually do have a thirst for knowledge that has taught me so many things. One of those things that I have come to understand better with the wealth of age and experiences is that none of this...none of the things we have around us, none of the comforts that we hold dear, none of the goals that achieve materially will last. Not even we are designed to last. After my half century of living and growing, loving and leaving, exploring and discovering I have come to this one conclusion that I am sure many have come to as well, that is that immortality and leaving a mark on history is all based on how you touch the others around you. how you impact (both good and bad) every human being that you come in contact with on a daily basis.
It is with this great and impossible task that I affirm to live by from this day forward. I am asking everyone and anyone that reads this (I am certain not many will get this far) to hold me to this task. For all my foibles and flaws, for all my pomposity and pride, for all my coldness and heartlessness. hold me to task and be sure that everyday I haven't forgotten you, I haven't missed any important milestones or forgotten that it is all of you, the people around me and my existence, that make me who I am. There should never be anything more important to any one then the people that make up their lives.
Over the past 13 years since my divorce I have done nothing to grow beyond who I was or who I had become. I wrapped myself in the blanket of parenthood to protect myself from the messiness of life and interaction. not to mention justified my lack of upward mobility on the time that I needed to spend doing the same. Believe me I am in no way attempting to say that the time I spent parenting (or some facsimile of it) was wasted, much to the contrary I believe to my core that the attention that I afforded my daughter has helped to grow her into a person that I am so very proud of and can hardly believe because of her accomplishments and her blossoming future. What I am saying is that in retrospect I believe that I didn't have to wall myself off from so many other things in my life.
i intend to do my best to mark the closing of each day with the collective sigh of relief that I have lived the day as completely as I can and that I will, each and every day strive to make the next dawn one to look forward to and to adventure through. We all should begin this year through, not inward self reflection but rather through the way we want to reach out to others around us. Both to those we know and those we don't know. Even a simple smile, a comforting hand, or spare change can make someone's day. What is the ultimate by-product of this outreaching of our souls is the inevitable sense of peace and fulfillment.
One of the things that I am planning on doing this month is launching a new "Man on the Street" video series. I am not too sure of its name or its breadth of content yet but I will be beginning with 10 simple questions that I will be asking random people on the street. I am always looking for questions to ask and would love to hear your suggestions. The only thing that I will strive to tempore in doing this is to not ask leading questions of any kind. This series will touch on a completely random amount of subjects but none of it will be biased in anyway. Although I have my own views I am not attempting with this to sway anyone in one way or the other. Let me know if this is something you might want to contribute to by sending me a message.